Welcome back!!! I know that I have been really quiet for the past few months, but I have been trying to find my feet again since having Dumpling and oh boy, did I really need that time.
I wanted to share my birth story immediately but thought instead to start at this angle instead. Becoming a parent has been one of the most eye opening experiences EVER. At this point you probably thinking, “well durh”, but let me elaborate, as I mentioned previously, I thought that I was pretty clued up when it came to being parent, but I am now realising, that even if I had been told what to expect, I would only truly be able to know once I was in it.
That being said, I am IMMENSELY thankful to my mom for everything that she has done for me, in raising me and my siblings and how she was able to do it all so calmly. I mean damn, there are times when I truly feel that I am failing at being a good parent, whether it is because Cupcake has a tantrum or because Dumpling is niggly, there are truly many moments when I think that maybe I am just not cut out for it, then my kids will turn around and do something amazing to prove me wrong.
Not to downplay the dad’s out there, I mean my dad is my HERO, I always tell him that. Even when my parents got divorced, and they both remarried, they would always try their best to work together to ensure that we got a good raising, and I will never be able to truly do them justice in showing them how grateful I am for that.
Being a mom of 2, I now realize that parenthood is such an awesome responsibility, and it is not only your children who you need to constantly keep guiding, but yourself as well. I need to constantly ensure that I keep myself in check so that whatever I do, is not done out of anger or frustration, because lets be honest, when your 2 year old is crying that he wants Oros in the middle of the night and all you want to is sleep, its easier to shout at them because you exhausted af, instead of calmly explaining that there isn’t and offering something else instead.
You see, I don’t want to be that parent that is constantly shouting and losing her cool, it is exhausting and unnecessary, not to mention unfair to the tiny little humans who look to me and Superman for guidance and love. So yes, even when I feel like I am beyond exhausted and on my last thread of patience, I will keep trying to keep it together for my kids. That being said, I will also be sitting in the kitchen once in a while and enjoying my oreos (I have now upgraded to the big box) and a tall glass of milk because hey, mom’s need a break too.
I am also realizing how important that break is, it is so vital to take that time to pull yourself towards yourself so that you can be the best mom you can be.
Not to mention roping in the reinforcements, after having Dumpling, I called my army (AKA the family) in to help me out. Whether it was just to take a shower, to help me with cooking,or even just to give me a chance to shave my legs, this amazing family of mine has truly helped me transition from being a mom of one to a mom of 2.
So yes, there are still moments where I question myself, moments when I am in doubt, moments when I lose the plot slightly and moments where I give myself the proverbial pat on the back, But, I am truly loving this amazing gift of motherhood. 🙂
And with Superman by my side, anything is possible. 🙂
Always with Love & Peace