Hope that you all are well & rested on this fine day,
The past few weeks have been quite hectic on me with Cupcake going through a few bouts of not being well. It was similar to going through a gauntlet, started off with a viral infection, then measles, then conjunctivitis, then back to a viral infection, ear infection and now teething.
I think if ever I had a period where I felt like a terrible mom, it would be now. Seeing Cupcake all cranky or just totally listless made me wish that I could take all the pain onto myself instead. Alas, this is not how things work in the real world, thus learning the true meaning of the word “Faith”.
We all believe in some way or form, be it a higher deity, the natural elements or are just completely agnostic. However, they all stem as a form of belief that there is something greater in control that is beyond our control. Quite simply, it has taken me to become a mother to truly understand that I am not in control of everything, that sometimes you need to accept the hand that you have been dealt and then ride the journey.
Sitting at the doctor , the pediatrician and also one night having to go to the hospital with Cupcake, I was truly terrified that my baby wasn’t well. Now we can boil it down to “Crazy Mama Syndrome” which I’m pretty sure I am to an extent, but also to the fact that I felt completely helpless that Cupcake wasn’t well. Hence leaving it in Allah (Gods) hands that my baby would get better; that I had no power to heal him, but the fact that I was doing everything that I could to ensure that he could get better was really enough.
And that is ultimately what it is, doing enough. Knowing that as a mom you won’t be able to protect your child from everything, knowing that there are going to be times that he is going to get the odd cold and go through growing pains. Having faith that he can get through it, no matter how difficult, will ease the feeling of helplessness that much more.
I do still feel at times that I wish he wouldn’t get sick and that Cupcake will always be the happy, burst of energy that I know. However I know that he has to go through certain things to become a tough little boy, and I have faith that regardless of the obstacles he faces, I will be able to be there to support him all the way. I won’t be able to do it for him, but I will be able to cheer lead him to success.
So the next time baby isn’t well, or your kids are going through a tough time, know that just by being there we are doing the best justice to them. By just being there we are proof enough that faith can get you through anything that it puts you to.
Till next time,