Today I wanted to post an article on what was meant to be the most natural experience after having Cupcake, breastfeeding. I summarized it quite a bit for fear of it being a bit too long winded.
After the nurse placed Cupcake on my chest, I held him ready to breastfeed and he wasn’t able to latch. Nothing happened.
I felt completely confused as to how to hold him, or whether he was drinking or not. Thankfully, help came in the form of the lactation consultant that was in the ward, she really helped me out for my entire duration at the hospital.
On the second day, I thought that Cupcake was struggling due to me not having any milk, only to be told that my boobs were so completely full that it was making it difficult for Cupcake to latch, ha, who knew! Superman then rushed home to get my breast pump and Cupcake was then given expressed milk in a little cup.
Once we were home, I truly started to struggle. Cupcake had to be held a certain way, and then that way wouldn’t work, then he would be crying because he was so hungry and just couldn’t latch. It was really one of the most trying times for me as breastfeeding was meant to be the easiest part of motherhood and I wasn’t able to do it.
Superman was starting to feel it to, as I had to express before every feed and then feed Cupcake with a bottle and he was one hungry little one. For the first few days I had to express every feed, as when he did successfully latch, it would only be for a few minutes.
This however didn’t deter me, I really wanted to breastfeed and I would keep trying until I got it right. I think another big motivating factor for me was since he was born via c-section, I atleast wanted to do something that I intended to do before Cupcake was born.
After many unsuccessful attempts and tears, Cupcake latched perfectly. I didn’t have to sit any particular way, or hold him in a particular way, if the milk was there, he found it. Definitely one of my proudest mommy moments, this is also one of the main reasons why I am already dreading having to give it up, as to me, it feels like I’m letting go of even more of the bond between Cupcake and I. Something that I am not ready for, as I feel he is already growing up so fast.
I just want to add that this in no way takes away from mothers who were unable to breastfeed or who chose formula, to each their own, as long as your baby grows up to be a strong, healthy and moral human being, then I think you did pretty awesome as a parent.
On another note, the other reason that I wanted to share this is proof that it’s okay to struggle, that you should never feel that you are expected to know anything. Motherhood is already a massive responsibility, one that comes with no manual, so to all mommys who are striving to do their best, I salute you! Well done!!!!
With love and Peace,